Well-Spoken Words (IV)

~ By Ajahn Jayasāro ~

At the same time as considering these five points within ourselves, we also practice being aware of them with regard to other people.

𝗜𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

We remind ourselves that we cannot read minds. We can never be completely sure of the other person’s intention. Nevertheless we reflect upon it: ‘Do they seem sincere? Do they want something from us? Are they trying to flatter or intimidate us?' While doing this, we are careful to avoid allowing our likes or dislikes for somebody to influence our interpretation of their worlds.

𝗧𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗣𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲

If the other person has chosen the time and place of the conversation, we consider whether or not we are comfortable with their choice. If we are not, then, if possible, we say so and suggest an alternative.

𝗧𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀

Sometimes people say things we believe to be false. We do not jump to the conclusion that they are lying. It is possible that our information is wrong, or that they believe their false words to be true, or even that they have simply forgotten things they’ve said and done in the past. It is only when bearing these possibilities in mind that we address the falsehood, and only then if we judge that it will be of benefit to do so.

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"Food for the Heart", a series of Dhamma teachings handwritten weekly is posted on the Buddhadāsa Indapañño Archives page with Ajahn's kind permission.

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For other teachings by Ven. Ajahn Jayasāro, please visit the Panyaprateep Foundation website.